The 2015/16 Ashes is nearly upon us as Australia defend the urn against a spirited England. As we enter into the commencing moments of what is promising to be a hard-fought and competitive series, we bring you the words that put an extra bit of pace on the ball and a little extra bite in the batting. The fierce rivalry between England and Australia has served up some classic quotes, from Glenn McGrath’s woeful predictions to Jim Laker’s ability to sum it up in one sentence.
“How anyone can spin a ball the width of Gatting boggles the mind.”– Journalist Martin Johnson after Warne bowled ‘the ball of the century’ to Mike Gatting.
“England have only three major problems. They can’t bat, they can’t bowl and they can’t field.” – Journalist Martin Johnson before the 1986 Ashes tour of Australia.
“Hell, Gatt, move out of the way, I can’t see the stumps.” – Dennis Lillee to Mike Gatting, during the opening match of England’s 1994-1995 Ashes tour.
“You’re just upset because no one loves you any more” – Kevin Pietersen to Shane Watson, who had just been dumped by his girlfriend.
“The way things are going, the next Ashes series cannot come too quickly for England. What a shame that we have to wait until 2013 to play this lot again.” – Geoff Boycott after the 2010/2011 Ashes series demolition of Australia.
“Let’s have you right under Nasser’s nose.” – Ian Healy placing a fielder yards away at cover when Nasser Hussain was batting.
“A fart competing with thunder” – Graham Gooch describes England’s effectiveness against the Aussies in the 90s.
“There’s a lot of good things about England, but I don’t want to tell you too many of them.” – Michael Clarke.
“Ashes to Ashes, dust to dust, if Thomson don’t get ya, Lillee must.” – A Sydney Daily Telegraph cartoon caption during the 1974-75 Ashes.
“Get ready for a broken fucking arm” – Michael Clarke to James Anderson, Brisbane, 2013-14
When Geraint Jones skied Warne to mid-off, England were 116 for seven, 13 short of victory with Lee steaming in from the other end. Hoggard loafed out to join Ashley Giles and said: “Come on, let’s me and you get it done.” Giles’s reply – “It’s reversing at 95mph”
“If you’re playing against the Australians, you don’t walk.” – Ian Botham explains how to play the Aussies!
“It was a day I’ll never forget. I never thought I would see England regain the Ashes”- English Sports Journalist Henry Blofeld, on England winning the Ashes cricket 2005
“We have tried to think of a better series… and can’t. But what’s made this so special is how long the wait has been for us to win the Ashes” – David Gower on England winning the best ever Ashes series in 200
“I definitely think they’re rattled by it. They don’t like it at all. Their coach has come out and wanted a truce from what I’ve heard, but that’s not going to change from our end” – Mitchell Johnson on Australia’s sledging policy.
Mockery at it’s best